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How do we deal with people who break relationships? How can we deal with those who cause divisions in families?

If you are wondering, How?
The word of God gives us practical instruction in,

Titus 3:10–11 NIV

10 Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them.

11 You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned.

Apostle Paul writes this instruction to Titus, who was the Pastor of a church in Crete. This instruction is written in the context of dealing with issues in the church. However, we can take certain aspects of it and apply them to our everyday life as well.

I believe all of us, at some point in our life, have met people who gossip, talk behind our backs and even break good friendships and relationships. Usually, when you confront such people, they will pretend and lie as if they didn’t do anything and their words will convince you that they are not wrong but you are the reason for the division.

This Cycle, this pattern, repeats over and over again.

As Christians, we tend to be gracious even with those who are causing us great problems.

How do we deal with it?

Titus 3:10–11 NIV

10 Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them.

11 You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned.

Give them a first warning, and then a second warning. If they don’t change, the bible says, “Have nothing to do with them.”

Which means,

• “Don’t entertain them.”
• “Don’t allow them to have a say in your life”
• “Don’t allow their words or actions to influence you in any way”

In life, if we don’t learn to separate ourselves from the wrong people, then we will never be able to meet the right people.

The Bible clearly says that these people persist in doing what they do because they are living in Sin, they are warped and sinful and they are self-condemned. In other words, they are against God, they are living life against God but they pretend to be people who are so nice and so wonderful but deep inside they are full of anger, and jealousy and they are always trying to break something in your life. So we are too gracious and sometimes we choose not to deal with them but here is the problem. If you choose to be gracious and choose not to deal with them as the word says, you will end up paying a great price for allowing that person in your life.

I did have a similar experience a few years ago. I was too nice to a person who was divisive. But eventually, I had to pay a price for that. As Christians, we often are too nice. Don’t do that. Always be a person who does the right thing…NOT Nice things.

There’s a big difference between, “being nice and being RIGHT.” The Bible encourages us to be a person who does the right thing.

Let’s pray,

Heavenly Father, your word instructs and gives insight in various circumstances but we fail to apply those instructions to our life. Lord, as a begin our day, we pray that you help us to do the right thing, and help us to deal with people who cause divisions and troubles in life. Help us to deal with them according to your word.

In Jesus’ name. Amen.